Tales from the Classroom

On Fridays, via Zoom, I teach a small English class of rising Ninth Graders who are in the Gifted and Talented Program in Fairfax County Public Schools. Yes, they truly are advanced students! 

I soon discovered, however, that these students are remedial when it comes to their study of classical literature — even the study of American Classical Literature, which is, comparatively speaking, easy to read and understand. 

We have in our literature book Of Places, an Abeka Book that I chose for these private classes, a selection titled "Adapted from The Legend of Sleepy Hollow" by Washington Irving, the Father of the American Short Story.  When I made that assignment, I discovered that my students knew absolutely nothing about Washington Irving and his works.  Indeed, they had never even heard of Rip Van Winkle!

Recently, during class time, I introduced my students to the video below of an abridged version of "Rip Van Winkle."  All of the students loved it!

Public schools are making a grave mistake in neglecting to have students study classical works. A deliberate neglect? Yes! After all, classics of literature often teach valuable moral lessons — such as the moral lessons stated at the end of the above video.

Tales From The Classroom

(For politics, please scroll down)

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge. The following blog post relates to a particular aspect of teacher training: that of communicating with parents)

From School Reports - What Teachers Really Mean:

1. Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering needed information from his classmates.
(He was caught cheating on a test).

2. Karen is an endless fund of energy and viability.
(The hyperactive monster can't stay seated for five minutes).

3. Fantastic imagination! Unmatched in his capacity for blending fact with fiction.
(He's definitely one of the biggest liars I have ever met).

4. Margie exhibits a casual, relaxed attitude to school, indicating that high expectations don't intimidate her.
(The lazy thing hasn't done one assignment all term).

5. Her athletic ability is marvelous. Superior hand-eye coordination.
(The little creep stung me with a rubber band from 15 feet away).

6. Nick thrives on interaction with his peers.
(Your son needs to stop socializing and start working).

7. Your daughter's greatest asset is her demonstrative public discussions.
(Classroom lawyer! Why is it that every time I explain an assignment she creates a class argument).

8. John enjoys the thrill of engaging challenges with his peers.
(He's a bully).

9. An adventurous nature lover who rarely misses opportunities to explore new territory.
(Your daughter was caught skipping school at the fishing pond).

10. I am amazed at her tenacity in retaining her youthful personality.
(She's so immature that we've run out of diapers).

11. Unlike some students who hide their emotion, Charles is very expressive and open.
(He must have written the Whiner's Guide).

12. I firmly believe that her intellectual and emotional progress would be enhanced through a year's repetition of her learning environment.
(Regretfully, we believe that she is not ready for high school and must repeat the 8th grade).

13. Her exuberant verbosity is awesome!
(A mouth that never stops yacking OR Is able to imaginatively express his thoughts in various media.
(Caught writing on bathroom walls.)

14. Displays leadership ability.
(Bossy.)

15. Has potential to stand out from his peers.
(Headed for America's Most Wanted.)

16. Technologically proficient.
(Hacked into school computer system.)

17. Handwriting is excellent.
(Forges parents' signatures.)

18. Creatively expresses himself.
(Uses profanity.)

19. Has materials available at all times.
(Desk overflowing with crap.)

20. Talented artist.
(Draws pictures in class.)

21. Meticulous worker.
(Never completes assignments.)

22. Independent thinker.
(Does not follow directions.)

23. Others look to her for guidance.
(Bad influence.)

24. Excellent multi-tasking abilities.
(Does not pay attention.)

25. Finishes all assignments quickly.
(Sloppy, careless work.)

26. Maintains constant cheerful attitude.
(Nothing phases him.)

Yes, we teachers actually receive training in how to use certain euphemisms. Mustn't freak out the parents or damage Little Johnny's self-esteem, you know.

Tales From The Classroom

(For politics, please scroll down)

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale dates back to 1983, when I was teaching a third-fourth grade combination class of 33 students)

Years ago, CS, a biracial student (4th grade student, but 5th grade age) who was enrolled in my class, miserably failed the weekly spelling test. I asked him why he hadn't studied for the test.

His response: "I failed the test because your ancestors held my ancestors as slaves."

I told CS the truth: "My ancestors didn't hold slaves. On my father's side, my family was opposed to slavery; on my mother's side, the ground they owned wouldn't sprout black-eyed peas — much less support even the holding of one slave. You failed the test because you didn't study for the test. You're on restriction until next week's spelling test."

CS sat there stunned.  Yes, from that day on, he did better on the weekly spelling test.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale dates back to 1982, when I was teaching third grade.)

D struggled academically. She had always struggled academically and had to repeat a grade or two.

But as an adult? She works as a high-ranking administrative assistant in the U.S. State Department and has beautiful daughter (about age 6).

The graphic below is my comment page on her book report Johnny Tremaine.

D's mother saved this book report in a memory box, and D recently sent me photos of some of her work from way back when.

Click directly on the image to enlarge it:

I am typically stingy with praise.  When a struggling student succeeds, however, I lavish the student with praise.

D says, all these years later, "The book report was a turning point for me."

Yes, a teacher really does touch the future.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale helps to explain why I love working with classes of homeschoolers. The parental support I typically receive is the antithesis of the reactions my public school and private school colleagues often encounter in a similar situation.

The students in my high school Advanced Composition classes write timed essays once a month.  These timed essays are completed in class within 25-30 minutes and are handwritten drafts of approximately 300 words; I mark these essays and provide "suggestions" for improvement.  Five weeks later, the students must submit revisions which require expansion (450-600 words).

On the first day of class this 2015-2016, the students received this timed-essay prompt, used by College Board on January 2015 SAT:

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  Note: for politics, please scroll down to other posts)

From fifth through ninth grades, I attended classes in the building pictured below the fold.

No wonder that I grew up loving history!  I attended school in a house filled with history.  Too bad that the walls couldn't talk to tell us what they had witnessed!

Sadly the building was torn down to make way for ugly modern buildings.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  Note: If you must have politics, please scroll down to other posts)

Over the Christmas break, each of my British Literature students independently reads a classic work from English Literature. Then the students submit a written book report and present an oral book review to the class.

I strive to assign each student a book that fits that student. Criteria: book that the student has never before read except in a very simplified edition, student's reading level, student's interests, student's personality. This year, I had two misses, both of them students new to the homeschool group I teach. One student really disliked 1984, which he found too negative. The student who read The Picture of Dorian Gray didn't care much for her assigned book, either; she said, "The book gave me nightmares."

This year's list of books read, with the student's grade level in parentheses:

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  Note: If you must have politics or discuss Ebola, please scroll down to other posts)

The video below presents information about autistics who have found a way to communicate via RPM. I have one such student in my class this year and refer to him as "the letter board kid" in casual conversations with my friends. He's brilliant — but different, of course.

I have long stated that my personal hero is Annie Sullivan, so it doesn't surprise those who know me that I like to work with those who have learning differences. Indeed, over the years I have found that those who are different bring something new to the table and often have unique insights.

Please watch the following short video, which clearly shows that not all with autism are hopeless cases:


Ah, the mysterious human brain!

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of a particularly poignant moment that occurred the Friday before Mother's Day in 1984 when I was teaching fourth grade.  Every year, as Mother's Day approaches, I remember that day in my classroom.   Note: If you must have politics, please scroll down to other posts)

I knew that K.L., a stunningly beautiful Filippina and a slightly-above-average student, had been adopted by her aunt and uncle shortly after both her parents died when she was about three years old.   Until that day in 1985, she had never spoken of her mom and dad.  "I don't remember them," she used to say.  Furthermore, she had bonded well with her extended family.

The official story about K.L.'s parents: they had died together in a car accident. Not so.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of two messages that I received the week of April 13, 2014  — just in time for the resuming of classes today after our Easter break.  I say "just in time," because during Easter Break every year, I feel that I should have done more for my students.  Note: If you must have politics, please scroll down to other posts)

Via Facebook. I recently received affirmations from two former student of some fifteen years ago when I was teaching sixth grade at a small private school. Both of these students were challenges behaviorally, but I consistently held them accountable. They each lost many a recess for their constant talking in class.

They fought me all the way.

Back then.

But now?

Below the fold is the first message I received:

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of something that happened on March 25, 2014.

Yesterday, I showed a DVD copy of Fitna to my American Government homeschool class as part of our study of the First Amendment. Jaws dropped, and, although I had intended that the showing of Fitna should consume less than half the class period, the discussion continued for the remainder of the class time we had.  I made a point of explaining that the word "Islam" means submission  — not peace (an incorrect definition which we hear time and time again).

Both parents and students participated in the discussion that ensued after a few moments of stunned silence upon the conclusion of the film.  One parent, who grew up in Lebanon, provided valuable information about shari'a.  After all, she knows a lot of that information firsthand.

Overall, however, I was amazed that so few parents, quite informed about most current events of all types, were unaware of the beheading of Drummer Lee Rigby on the streets of London on May 22, 2013!

I typically show Fitna to particular classes, which I teach on a rotating basis according to a four-year culce: World History and American Government. To preface the film, I always tell the class a bit about Geert Wilders and some of the events portrayed in the film; I also share with the class some recent current events related to the worldwide jihad. After the film, I sent the students a followup link — this year, Hiding in Plain Sight: Jihadi Activism on Twitter (dated March 24, 2014).

Fitna:

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of something that happened the first time that I as a student teacher was in sole charge of teaching a class — in 1973, at a school in an upper-middle-class and wealthy area)

The following paragraph from this recent essay at the Washington Post's web site prompted me to recall the first time that I took the helm as a classroom teacher of a high school class:

All of you former students: you did not design curricula, plan lessons, attend faculty meetings, assess papers, design rubrics, create exams, prepare report cards, and monitor attendance. You did not tutor students, review rough drafts, and create study questions. You did not assign homework. You did not write daily lesson objectives on the white board. You did not write poems of the week on the white board. You did not write homework on the white board. You did not learn to write legibly on the white board while simultaneously making sure that none of your students threw a chair out a window.

If only my first test as a teacher able to control a room full of students had been limited to the possibility of a student's tossing a chair out a window!

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of an experience that I had in January 1971, when I was taking my first course in education so as to certify as a teacher in secondary school)

Dr. Evers, an elderly professor who taught Foundations of Education, the first required course for teacher certification, was a piece of work.

A real piece of work.

One could make the case that Dr. Evers was merely senile.  Or one could make the case that he was a rabid Leftist.

Whatever.

All students seeking teacher certification at the university had to take this one course from him.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of something that happened when I was teaching sixth grade in 1993.  If you must have politics, please scroll down; yesterday, I posted about the recent shootings at Columbia Mall in Maryland)

David, the director's favorite grandson, was a brilliant student.  He wasn't a troublemaker and, therefore, often had his assigned seat in the final row of desks.

David did have one bad habit, however: when he was concentrating on something, he liked to sit on his knees while in his student desk.  He had received many warnings about the precariousness of such posture, but often continued sitting on his knees.

One day, his bad habit was forever reformed.

Tales From The Classroom

"Tales from the Classroom" is a feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  Previous tales have presented matters from my own personal knowledge.   The following tale, however, comes from the Washington Post.  

As one who refused to pass the star football player back in 1975 and was thereby forced out of the public schools system, some twenty years later finding that a similar attitude had come to prevail in some private schools as well, I know that the article presents the uncomfortable truth about what passes for education today.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a new feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of something that happened in August 2013)

In addition to teaching classes of homeschoolers, I do private tutoring.

Last summer, I tutored two teenaged brothers of Chinese descent, one of the boys a rising seventh grader and the other a rising ninth grader. Both had long been homeschooled and would be entering the honors programs in public school system in September.  Not by any stretch of the imagination were these tutoring sessions remedial in nature. One or both of these superior students had already read several works of literature: Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451, John Steinbeck's Of Mice and Men, Jack London's The Call of the Wild, Charles Dickens's David Copperfield, Mark Twain's The Adventures of Tom Sawyer — as well as many others.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a new feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of something that happened in November 2013)

On November 12, I received the earliest Christmas card ever from one of my students — the youngest student in the homeschool group. This little girl is only eight years old, and we admitted her on one-month probation last year to the middle school classes, classes for those from ages 11-14.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a new feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of something that happened in the mid-1980s)

Jodi was a very bright seventh grader — or so we thought until time for the science fair came.

Jodi had submitted an elaborate plan for testing her hypothesis as to how certain factors affected plant growth. She planted corn in various containers and subjected those containers to different factors.

Jodi on the day of a progress check (frowning with dismay): I may have to change my project.  None of the corn I planted is sprouting!

Teacher: Corn is usually very easy to grow.  Maybe you planted hybrid kernels.  Hybrid kernels do not usually reproduce.  Where did you get the kernels you planted?  What kind of corn did you plant?

Jodi: Libby's.

Teacher (incredulously): You planted canned corn?  Canning kills the kernel!

Today, Jodi is a state-certified science teacher at the elementary-school level.

Tales From The Classroom

("Tales from the Classroom" is a new feature posted occasionally here at this blog.  All tales are true and present matters about which I have personal knowledge.  The following tale relates the story of something that occurred in September 2013)

Student A decided to help her classmate Student B. Both students, graduates from high school last June, attend a community college, the credits from which are accepted at all universities in the state of Virginia. Student A and Student B are enrolled in a precalculus course.

Upon helping Student B for a few minutes, Student A discerned that Student B's mathematics skills were woefully inadequate for embarking upon a study of precalculus.

Student A (frowning with dismay): What math courses did you take in high school?

Student B (cheerfully): I had a hard time with Algebra I.  Next, I tried Algebra II, but I failed.  I took a class in function and did okay with that.  I'm taking calculus now because I heard that calculus was easier.

A few weeks later, the day of the midterm exam...

Student B (euphorically): I'm going to get an A on this exam.  My fourth grade sister tutored me over the weekend.